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March 4, 2021

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So this guy was heading from northern Arizona to Phoenix, which is in southern Arizona. He called his wife from Flagstaff. That's a two-hour, 75-mile-an-hour drive. "See you in a couple of hours," he said. So he got on the Interstate and took full advantage of those Western speed limits. He had a lot on his mind that day - apparently not including where he was going. By the time he realized what road he was on, he was almost in California; nowhere near Phoenix! Nowhere near home! The guy? Yeah, that was me. I was lost. I didn't even know it!

March 2, 2021

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Back in the 1950s, Walt Disney went to an amusement park he didn't like very much. It was a mess; there was litter all over the ground, dirty bathrooms. It just felt tacky. So he made up his mind that when he built the theme park he had dreamed of, it would never be a mess. If you've ever been to Disneyland or Disney World, you know he got what he wanted. Any time we've been there, it's been amazingly clean; I mean, considering the millions of people who go through there. I've been told that they have a simple strategy that makes Disney parks clean places. Take care of a mess right away. One day at Disney World I dropped my Coke cup and this guy with mouse ears made a flying leap and caught it before it hit the ground. OK, I'm exaggerating. But it almost feels like that. It really does stay clean there because they just won't let a mess get started.

February 26, 2021

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He's not the youngest motorcycle rider in the pack, but he's got to be one of the most devoted. Take that away from him and you'd be taking away one of the great joys of his life. Problem: he's been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease. And as that condition progresses, he can expect to begin to experience some disorientation, among other things. That's not a good thing for a fellow running around on his motorcycle. So he has installed a global positioning system on his bike which will always show him where he is going and where home is. That way, if one day he's out on his bike and forgets his way home, he'll be able to find his way home no matter where he goes.

February 22, 2021

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My grandson then was three years old and I'd promised to take him out to lunch, and apparently he was looking forward to it. Here's how I know that. He was ready a few minutes early, and I was a few minutes late. As I was about to leave, an email came through with a picture of him that had just been taken. Oh, boy, it broke my heart. It showed the back of our little guy as he sat on the floor in the doorway, looking down the stairs expectantly, propping the door open with one foot. I made record time driving to his house.

February 18, 2021

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Okay, imagine I'm holding a $20 bill in my hand. I don't get to do that too often (at least it doesn't stay there), so this would be a really special moment for me. If you were sitting here with me and I offered that $20 to you, would you take it? I think you would. Now you're going to have to use your imagination to picture this, but let's say I'm now crumpling that nice $20 bill and I'm crushing it into a little wad. Can you picture that? You still want it? If you were right here, would you still take it? It's all wadded up. OK, now pretend I'm beating on this wadded up bill, and I am actually stomping on it with my foot. (I could get some exercise this way.) If I still offered to you this $20, would you still take it? It's been beat up, it's been crushed, it's been stomped on! Well, of course you would.

February 16, 2021

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My friend Jim was young, but already a veteran rock climber. He was going to college only a few miles from one of America's most majestic mountain peaks...and one of the most challenging and dangerous to climb. He was excited to climb another towering mountain with a longtime veteran of those slopes. The mountain is actually part of the highest peak, but it's known as Disappointment Peak. It got its name from climbers who used that approach to get to the top of that ultimate mountain top. It's a tough climb, but you're inspired by the sense you're getting closer and closer to your majestic goal. And then, after a long, hard climb, you suddenly come to this chasm; a chasm that is uncrossable and thousands of feet deep. You thought you were on your way to the goal you were shooting for. Sorry, it's Disappointment Peak.

February 12, 2021

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Our son had just finished his first day of high school and he thought he had found the "happy hunting ground." For girls, that is. He regaled his sister, then a junior in high school, with stories about all the incredible girls he'd seen that day. The more he talked, the more disgusted she became. Finally, she just blurted out, "You are so superficial!" To which he immediately replied, "Well, of course. I'm a freshman! We're into superficial!"

February 8, 2021

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Stonewall Jackson was one of the South's greatest generals in the Civil War, and he died on the battlefield - shot by mistake by his own men. He's possibly the most famous victim of one of war's greatest tragedies. They call it friendly fire. It's bad enough that a fellow soldier is killed by enemy fire, but the heartbreak is compounded when someone is shot by their own.

February 4, 2021

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It wasn't part of the day that I had planned, but it was an invitation I couldn't refuse. A friend asked me on the spur of the moment if I'd go to lunch with him. He was paying. "Yep, can do!" What I didn't know was that my friend was taking me to a private club where he was a member. We're talking like upscale dining here. I was wearing a dress shirt and slacks which made me among the best-dressed at McDonald's. But apparently it left me sadly underdressed for this private club. The host gently informed me that a suit coat or sport jacket was required for entrance. As I was about to give my friend my takeout order, the host reached into a closet and produced a sport coat. He said, "Just wear this." I did. It was a great place. It was a great lunch. And did I mention he paid? Oh, yeah, right.

February 2, 2021

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I'm glad I was raised in a part of the country that's a real "four seasons" place, because I love all four seasons! Where I grew up, one of them seemed a little longer than the others. It was called winter. But I think fall is my favorite season of all. I love the blooming beauty of the spring, but my favorite is the blazing colors of those fall leaves. It's not that the leaves have no color the rest of the year, but I've never known people to drive far away to see the beautiful green leaves. They will travel to see the leaves of fall. The ironic thing is that they are about to die at that point. But they are something to see!

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