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Now, if I said I was going to give you the great secrets of hitting a baseball, I don't think you're going to go right out and try them. You're going to be skeptical, and you should be. But if one of the game's greatest hitters were to tell you the secret of hitting a baseball, well now you should pay attention.
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America runs on coffee! Yeah, let's face it! Now, you might object to that, but I don't know on what grounds. You know, there are people who drink coffee, and then there are some who mainline coffee. I have friends who do that, and it keeps people like the makers of those little quickie coffee units very busy. In fact, those little units are a good example of the importance of something called the filter.
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I saw one of those bumper frames for your license plate. It said, "Happiness is being a grandparent." Oh, that's the truth! I mean, I remember when I was a little kid. Happiness was having a grandparent with you, especially my grandmother. Because it always meant surprises; it meant going out to eat, and it almost always meant money! That's what grandparents are for, of course, to spoil kids. Any time I knew that I would be seeing Grandma I was excited to see what surprises she would bring. If we're that way about grandma, we should really be looking forward to what Father has for us today; that's Father with a capital F.
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Honestly I dislike shopping for clothes. Looking for a suit would rank right up there with a root canal or something. As far as the pleasure factor is, I'd say. The problem is that they just don't have suits for guys who are shaped like me. Maybe there just aren't many guys who are shaped like me; maybe that's the problem.
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Not long ago there were pictures all over the news of these spectacular colors painting a breathtaking scene in the night sky. It was the "northern lights," also known to scientists as the aurora borealis. Now, I'll tell you what! It's worth checking out that view any time you can or at least those pictures. I guess the approach of solar flares from the sun's turbulence sometimes just adds a whole new richness to these lights. Of course, they have amazed people for centuries.
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We were sitting on the runway at O'Hare Airport for a long time, in an airplane that is. I thought we were on our way when we left the gate. I said to myself "Okay, in a couple of minutes we'll be in the air and on our way." And then they routed us across the backside of O'Hare, and I saw some lovely storage facilities. We finally ended up in a long, long line of aircraft. I've got a little problem with impatience, but I sure don't want the pilot to have that problem. See, he knows that you do not take off until you get clearance from the tower...no matter how long that means you have to wait.
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Over the years, when our kids were growing up and at home, they didn't carry a wallet full of money. And they did need some money along the way. They had to buy their lunch at school. They had to buy clothes when they outgrew them or wore them out; which happened frequently. They had to pay admission prices when they went to special attractions. They needed spending money for trips and vacations, and for cards and gifts.
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There's bad plaque and there's good plaque. The bad kind is that substance that builds up on your teeth that you see in all the toothpaste commercials. They're going to help you get rid of that. Oh, and then there's good plaque; that's the kind we have hanging on walls all over our house.
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I've actually tried to explain American football to people from another country. It's not easy. Sometimes it's not easy to explain it to someone from this country, especially to some women who don't really care much about how it's played.
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They break in and say it's breaking news. More often than not, it's heartbreaking news. We just get numbers that just quantify a lot of hurt in a lot of lives. I mean, there's jobs lost, and homes lost, and loved ones lost, record numbers living in poverty, and struggling families, and devastating disasters, and always, always, people dying.
