Because we have so many Native American friends in the Southwest, I was carefully watching a ravenous wildfire in eastern Arizona. When you're told to evacuate, honestly you never know if you'll have a home to come back to.
One day I caught a snatch of a TV talk show which I otherwise would never have seen. But the host was interviewing a former FBI agent. He's a man who successfully infiltrated the mafia for several years, and he'd been responsible for bringing evidence in some major indictments against mob leadership. Now, one factor in his underground life was a major source of criminal income. OK, here he was, a pretty straight person, surrounded by cocaine. Well, the host asked the FBI man an interesting question. He said, "Did you ever have to use cocaine?" That's a pretty good question, I thought. After all, his life depended on his fitting in, right? Well, he said, "No, I never did." And the host said, "Well, how did you avoid it?" I liked his answer. It might even help you when you're feeling the pressure to fit in.
It was so cold in the house when I woke up that bitter winter morning. The thermometer announced to me it was like 40-some degrees in the house! I mean, my kids had some good laughs and some rare comments when they saw me praying that morning in front of an open stove in the kitchen. Look, it was the only warm place in the house! Well, Mr. Furnace came over, and he checked things out and informed us that we needed a new thermostat. As soon as our thermostat was working, the thermometer had better news for us; the house was warming up again! It is amazing what a difference a functioning thermostat can make!
It was a pretty amusing billboard; a cartoon drawing of a wide-eyed, bewildered-looking squirrel, holding a broken cable in his paws. The sign just said, "Call before you dig" and he gave a toll-free phone number. The utility folks have this problem. I'm not sure if it's with squirrels; it certainly is with people. They start digging and they cut right into their lines and their cables. I mean, those could be gas lines, phone lines, or phone cables. And in the process, the happy diggers make a big mess for the utility company and their customers. A mess that could have easily been avoided.
When a member of our family would "shirk" a chore they had at our house, we had a familiar line that we used jokingly. Somebody would say, "Oh, it's so hard to get good help these days." Actually, I first heard that from a friend of mine who said that about trying to find a housekeeper. Now, that wasn't a real heavy issue for us, hiring a good housekeeper. We had a family!
Okay, so the glass says "Coke" on it. But the label would be wrong. See, the glass is filled with water; which of course, would be much healthier for me. Now there's no way I could put any Coke in that glass. No, you see, you can't put any other liquid in it because there's no room for anything but water because it's full. Aren't you glad you tuned in for that science lesson?
Since Jim was a boy, it's always been a custom in his family to usher in the new year with fireworks. It's legal where they live. Recently, he told me about the New Year's Eve celebration he remembers more than any other. The church was having a traditional watch night service where everyone prayed in the new year. In fact, the pastor was praying right at the stroke of midnight. At the same time, not far from the church, Jim's dad was taking time out to bring in the new year a little differently. Not with fireworks - with dynamite! He had some dynamite left from a construction project. He thought it would be a great idea to set it off at the stroke of midnight - which he did! Suddenly, everybody in the church was startled by this thunderous explosion outside. The pastor never missed a beat in his prayer.
So, what do you think of when I say the word "Go-fer"? Well, if you live in the country, you probably think of a little animal that keeps disappearing into holes. If you work in an office and I say, "Go-fer," you're thinking of the person who keeps getting stuck running all the menial errands, maybe you - that's the go-fer spelled a little differently. That's "go-fer," like "go fer this" and "go fer that." Right? Now, usually a human go-fer is someone who has the least authority and the least seniority. Can you imagine having, say the president or the boss of the company, also be the company go-fer?
Our son-in-law's piano recital was like his final exam. He was a music major in college, and his recital was an important part of his finishing well. I taught him all I knew about playing the piano, of course, which was how to find "middle C." Actually, he had become an accomplished musician - something that was evident to everybody who attended that senior recital - Including us. At the end, there was quite a line of people congratulating him on his great performance. But strangely, there was no one complimenting the piano, "Wonderful concert, Mr. Steinway. You are awesome." No, it was only the one who played the music that deserved the praise.
Our oldest grandson was just two years old and really excited about the new book I just bought him. We kept it at our house for his granddad to read to him. It's one of the all-time kids' bestsellers - you know - "The Little Engine That Could"? If so, then you remember the four words that carried that engine up and over the mountain no one thought he could climb. Remember? If you know them, say them with me, "I think I can." That's right. That part where the engine says those words over and over is my favorite part to read always to grandchildren, and obviously, it was their favorite part, too, including his. When I showed Jordan the cover of the book, he started his breathless, two-year-old version of the little engine's classic chant, "I think I can...I think I can...I think I can...I think I can." You know what? I was hoping he'd be saying that for a long time.