Your Relationships

Showing Your Child How to Live - #7795

Friday, November 25, 2016

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Our grandson was just about six months old, but it was obvious even then that he and his Mother had a very close relationship. In fact, I noticed back then an interesting dimension of their connectedness. There will be a sudden loud noise or a rowdy outburst by someone-like me for example-and you could tell that my grandson didn't know how he should respond. So instinctively he looked at his mother. His mother knew that, and she had learned how important it was for her to look calm and unfazed, no matter what was coming down. See, he studied her reaction for a moment and then he just obviously decided to do what she did, respond the same way; no tears, no fear. "Hey, Mom's OK. I'm OK."

Why There Are Desperate Housewives - #7780

Friday, November 4, 2016

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Some years ago there was a, well, then a new TV show, and I was surprised that it caught on. The title was Desperate Housewives, and it actually sky-rocketed into being a hit its very first season. I thought, "How come a show named Desperate Housewives would be so popular?" You wonder if there are a lot of women that could relate to that title. Maybe in reality there are more than a few of those desperate housewives.

The Problem With Pushing - #7767

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

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What do you call it when your dog has eight puppies? Octuplets? Ocpuplets? I don't know. Years ago, our Radio Production Manager, well, he probably would have just said you call it a handful. His dog was Sister. No, not a relative; that was her name-had eight puppies. He got to look after them until he could find homes for them. Apparently eight can be a challenge. He told me about one day when he was just trying to get them back into their pen. He said, "I was doing all I could to push those puppies back in. I'd get two or three in. Then while I was reaching for another one, one or two would kind of wiggle back out." (You can probably almost picture this can't you?) After a lot of pushing and shoving, he finally gave up for a while. He said, "You know, here's the funny part"-actually, I thought the picture of him losing to those puppies was the funny part-but he said, "within 10 minutes, guess where those rambunctious puppies were?" All of them were inside by the pen, without any pushing from him! They chose to do what he couldn't force them to do!

Lightening Their Load - #7761

Monday, October 10, 2016

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Moving day! Good news, bad news. The process of moving is horrible. The result, once you find everything you packed, is wonderful. Years ago, my Administrative Assistant got to experience all that good news and bad news. Actually, the bad news turned out to be not so bad. It could have been bad. She was just one woman with some heavy stuff to move; refrigerator, stove, piano, plus lots of smaller things. Now, I was out of town when she moved, which was good planning. But I talked to her a few days after the big migration. And all she could talk about was the difference her friends had made. The guys pitched in on the especially exciting things like the piano. The women carried some of the other items. And even her little nephews joined the team. They carried the little nephew sized stuff. Each person carried what he or she could. Gayle said, "You know, when I look at each piece of furniture in my apartment, I think of a person; the one who helped carry that particular burden." The burdens turned out to have a lot of blessing in them because of friends who helped her carry what she could never carry alone.

A Bucket of Water, or a Three-Alarm Fire - #7744

Thursday, September 15, 2016

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I'm a tornado and hurricane kind of guy. I mean I don't like them but, I've lived where you learn about those things. I'm not an earthquake kind of guy. I've never lived where those mattered much. But when I was in San Francisco, I was where earthquakes are a big deal! Most people there still have dramatic stories to tell about what happened during that big quake in 1989, the one that interrupted the 3rd game of the World Series. Some of the heaviest damage and injury was in the Marina District of San Francisco.

The 'Game Time' Difference - #7736

Monday, September 5, 2016

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Years ago, when my son-in-law lived in the Chicago area, he was in his "heyday" because it was the "heyday" of the Chicago Bulls. That was hard for me, being in the New York area as a New York Knicks fan. But, listen! Back then the Bulls had one of the most amazing teams in basketball history. Actually, I think my son-in-law had to go into a recovery program for Bulls addicts back then. But he reminds me of the Bulls' greatness regularly. In the days when they were building their basketball juggernaut, I was told the players would get in a circle and one of them would ask, "What time is it?" And they'd answer louder every time they asked the question, "It's game time!" They seemed to know what time it was almost every time they got on the court. In fact, Bulls fans told me back then that the players weren't really that close off the court. Reportedly, it was pretty quiet when they were traveling, didn't even talk to each other much. When it's wasn't game time they didn't get together off the court. But, when it was game time, the differences didn't matter, they had a job to do. They were a team!

Love Without the Taking - #7734

Thursday, September 1, 2016

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I'm really not too excited about the fact that a lot of the commercials on television are for beer. And, unfortunately, a lot of them are pretty well done and hard to forget. I remember some years ago, actually, there was one that had a punch line in it that people would jokingly quote all the time. The problem is that it inadvertently portrayed how alcohol does make some people act. Maybe you'll remember it. This guy said to his Dad in this kind of sensitivity that the new man is supposed to display, "I love you, man." At which point his Dad says, "You're not getting my beer." Okay. And who wants it? In another commercial the same loser is telling a girl, "I love you." But she also knows he's saying that just to get her beer. Why? Anyway, now, the guy is saying all the right words, but it's to get something. In this case, something he shouldn't have in the first place.

The Wound Not Treated - #7729

Thursday, August 25, 2016

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I got a "boo-boo." It happened when we were in the middle of major outreaches on Indian reservations with our On Eagles' Wings team of young Native Americans. It was just a scrape on my wrist. I don't even know how it happened. It seemed like no big deal at the time. And it might have been no big deal if I had thought to clean it at the time, but I barely knew that it happened. I woke up two days later to see red all around the wound and red lines starting up my arm. Is that bad? Yeah. I offered myself a brief medical opinion – "uh-oh." Our team nurse seemed pretty concerned about it as she carefully cleansed it and treated it. She recommended some antibiotic to keep it from getting into my veins. Several days of twice-a-day treatment and some antibiotic did the trick. I hate to think what would have happened if I'd let it go any longer.

The Wound Underneath - #7720

Friday, August 12, 2016

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When you hear a helicopter going over, you probably look up. I know I do. But it's probably not a major emotional experience for you. It is for Megan's Dad. She told me that she and her Dad were outside recently when a chopper flew over. In her words, "My Dad suddenly hit the deck." In other words, he just instinctively fell to the ground. Now, you could look at that reaction and say, "Is he a little strange, or what?" No, not strange. He's a Vietnam Veteran. Obviously, Megan was really surprised by her father's unusual behavior. So she said, "What's wrong, Dad?" He said, "It's just part of post-Vietnam trauma. When I hear a chopper, it just triggers something inside. I'm suddenly in combat again." That's when Megan understood.

Playing Favorites, Playing Fair - #7668

Wednesday, June 1, 2016

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Did you ever notice what great scorekeepers kids are? They are really adept at measuring how they're being treated compared to the other kids in the family, right? Our oldest child was followed about two years later by her younger brother. It was our son who introduced me to this scorekeeping aptitude that children have. He had this simple 4-word question. "How come my sister...?" Which would always be followed with his presentation of some perceived injustice in how we were treating him compared to how we were treating his sister. She apparently got something good that he didn't get or he got something bad that she didn't get. When I was on a trip, I sure thought twice when I was buying gifts for my children. I knew that any hint of favoritism could get me in big trouble.

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