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April 8, 2024

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Sister is a dog. No, I didn't say my sister was a dog. My friend, Curtis, has a dog named Sister, which leads to some very amusing sentences. When Curtis' Sister first arrived in our area, Sister lived in this big, fenced-in area around the house. But Curtis got a nice dog house for Sister, the dog that is, and went to work making it a nice winter home for her. He installed two inches of insulation, put in a new floor, and even put a waterbed heater under the floor and some zip lock bags of water for the heater to heat. Sister basically had her own home with her own waterbed.

April 5, 2024

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It's the Super Bowl of the Skies! No ticket required.

April 4, 2024

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My wife and I got a late start for our drive to North Carolina this one particular trip, and we had a 12-hour drive from New Jersey to cover. So we thought we'd make a motel reservation somewhere in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia. We got there pretty late and saw this disgruntled looking man leaving the lobby, heading for his car. And it was not the look of a man who had just received good news. When I walked up to the check-in desk - nobody home, just a sign that read, "Back in a few minutes."

April 3, 2024

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You sit there staring at the phone for 45 minutes. There's this girl you really want to ask out, but every time you try to pick up the phone to call her, you freeze. Finally, you realize she probably isn't going to call you, and the phone isn't going to call her all by itself. So, you punch in her number. Are you still afraid? Yes. But courage is not the absence of fear, it's the disregard of it! So here goes! Yes, that actually was my life at one time.

April 2, 2024

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Now it's always been my impression that the police like to have the element of surprise in their favor. Suddenly there's a police car coming up behind you, or appearing out of nowhere. That's why I was surprised by something I saw when I was meeting with some staff we had in Latin America in Guadalajara, Mexico. At night we were driving around with our Director, Timothy, and we saw a police car in front of us. Now, he was in no particular hurry, but his lights were flashing. Timothy said, "You know, the police cars here do that all the time. They leave their lights on whether they are on call or not." Now, that's an interesting approach to law enforcement - let them know you're coming.

April 1, 2024

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"We were closer when we were poorer." The lady who told me that was speaking about her marriage, and she wasn't poor any more. You could tell that by looking at her. She was very affluent. But she was telling me that she and her husband were closer in the early days of their relationship when they were pinching pennies, and scraping by, and wondering how they were going to pay the rent, and fighting the wolf at the door. But they were at least fighting the wolf together.

March 29, 2024

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You can always tell when Easter's on its way. All the Jesus shows start popping up on TV. And that's a good thing. I remember a few years ago there was one that was pretty good called A.D. - The Bible Continues. That's the sequel to a series called The Bible.

March 28, 2024

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It started with an almost unthinkable radio transmission to an emergency number.

March 27, 2024

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First, the forsythia exploded - those little yellow flowers that announced to our area where we were living that spring was finally springing. Then the dogwood explosion detonated. It was really hard to be in a bad mood when those beautiful pink and white blossoms suddenly appeared everywhere. Happens probably where you live too, maybe just at different times. Actually, the word "suddenly" needs a little work. The coming of the forsythia and the dogwood, and all the other stars of the Spring Extravaganza - they've been getting ready to happen for a long time. We couldn't see it, but there's been this invisible process of nourishing and growth, and those nubby little buds start to peek out. And then, one day you start down the street and it's blazing with color that wasn't even there the day before. But sudden? Not really.

March 26, 2024

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When my wife got a headache I would try to be sympathetic. But occasionally I'd just say, "Well, honey, you know pain always attacks at the weakest point." Sensitive guy, huh? Well, one time my wife was having headaches every day, and burning eyes, and stinging eyes and I really was sympathetic. And she attributed it to the long hours that she'd been working, and she had been. She barely even noticed that her vision was slowly becoming worse. Some time went by. She finally took the time to go to the optometrist, and he said, "Lady, you need glasses." She said that was the day her eyes stopped burning. The headaches stopped, and the road signs suddenly cleared up. She only had one regret. She said, "Why did I wait so long?"

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