Monday, August 5, 2002

There's one kind of mail from the bank that nobody wants to get - you know, that notice that you've overdrawn your checking account! Especially when they sock you with a penalty for it. It can happen because you've been traveling or unusually busy, or you know, kind of cutting things pretty close financially, or just because you inadvertently wrote some checks before your recent deposit has cleared. You can't try to buy or pay before the money is there to cover it, or you'll just end up paying for that.

Wednesday, July 31, 2002

My regular routine doesn't allow me as much exercise as I'd like. So when we get a few days away, I enjoy picking up the pace a little with some biking or hiking that I don't usually get to do. Of course, I can usually feel that I haven't been doing it enough. The next morning I'm hurting in places I didn't even know I had places. I remember one time we were away at the shore, and I did this sunrise jog on the beach. I felt so healthy - and so beat. I was pounding back on the sand, all tired and sweaty and out of breath, thinking about walking the rest of the way. Suddenly, I saw my wife in the distance. And suddenly my motivation was back! I picked up my pace like an Olympian. Now I had almost reached her when I saw what she had written in huge letters in the sand, "I love you, Ron." Oh! What a happy ending to a long, hard run!

Tuesday, July 30, 2002

OK, I couldn't put it off any longer - we had to move the piano. Now, in spite of my Arnold Schwarzenaegger-build (this is radio; you'll never know), I decided it wouldn't be a good idea to move that monster alone. In fact, I remember my dad needed surgery after he helped move a piano once! So the time we moved the piano was determined by one thing: what time could some guys be there to help? As we eased that piano slowly down the front steps, I was so thankful for those other guys. I had my hands full just carrying my corner! This was something that was obviously never meant to be carried alone.

Friday, July 26, 2002

Somewhere back in the deep storage of your brain files, you probably remember him from World History class: the emperor Charlemagne. I always thought it was "Charley Magney" until my teacher corrected me. Actually, Charlemagne was the most powerful European ruler of the Middle Ages, leading a people called the Franks to rule most of Europe. Under his rule, many people got baptized into the Church. It was pretty much expected of his soldiers, for example. In fact, they would go down to the river en masse and take the plunge. But one source reports that there was one thing that was a bit unusual about the baptisms of those soldiers. When they would go under the water, they would hold one hand out of the water with their sword in that hand. They didn't want that hand baptized. That was the one they wanted to be free to use to kill whoever they needed to kill.

Wednesday, July 24, 2002

When you're a senior in a conservatory of music, your final college exam isn't about essay questions, reading reports, or true-or-false questions. It's about performing. And when our son-in-law was completing his college music major, that meant the pressure of his senior piano recital. Seated at a grand piano that night, all decked out in his tux, he dazzled the audience with his performances of sacred music and classical music and popular music - even original music he had written. Afterwards, there was a long line of people standing in line to congratulate him. Interestingly enough, not one person congratulated the piano!

Tuesday, July 23, 2002

It was Yogi Berra who gave us that unforgettable wisdom of the ages - "It ain't over 'till it's over." I'll tell you one man who believes that: John Glenn. Yes, he had become an American hero in 1962 with his historic, manned, orbital flight around the earth. And, oh yes, he had gone on to become a United States Senator. That should be enough for one lifetime, right? Especially at the ripe old age of 78. But not for John Glenn. Nope! At an age when some people are just coasting to the finish line, John Glenn went back into space! It was just amazing to see him be part of the crew of the Shuttle Discovery, blasting into space with crewmen half his age. What a hero! At a time when a lot of people think all their important missions are behind them, John Glenn was still flying them!

Monday, July 22, 2002

One of the most amazing Christian warriors in my lifetime is a man who has come to be known as Brother Andrew, or "God's Smuggler." He's risked everything to get God's Word into spiritually closed countries where that was virtually impossible. Many consider him a real spiritual hero. No one can doubt that he is, at the very least, a bold risk-taker for Christ.

In his biography, he tells about an incident in his early life as a follower of Christ that showed him the kind of God he was serving. After some pretty wild years without the Lord, he came to Christ and almost immediately felt the call to begin training for the ministry. He went to this small Bible school in Scotland, and before the students were allowed to graduate, they were given a very unusual assignment. They were asked to go out for a month to do evangelistic outreaches in Scottish villages, and they were given some money to live on - one British pound, to be exact. For those of us who are Americans, it would be like being given a dollar to live on for a month. The students were to go with that one bill and eat, and sleep, and rent halls, and buy refreshments, and hold outreaches, and return that one bill at the end of the month. Brother Andrew's team went out and did just that. Except he returned with enough money for the school to send out two missionaries!

Thursday, July 18, 2002

It was the first time we had taken our children to see Washington, D.C. We had a six-year-old, a four-year-old, and-a not quite two-year old. The stop I remember most is the U.S. Capitol Building - the one with all those steps. Those steps look pretty challenging when you're an adult - I can't imagine what they must have looked like to a two-year-old. There was obviously no way his little legs would get him to the top. But he did get there. Well, thanks to my little legs. I carried him.

Tuesday, July 16, 2002

When we're out to eat, we like to bring a little light-heartedness into the life of the person who is serving our table. My wife suggests that I'm on the "10 Most Wanted List" of waitresses, but I'm just trying to put a little fun in their day. For example, I tell her we can't order because we don't know her name - my mother told me never to talk to strangers. That helps us get acquainted. Later, when she checks back with us, she'll often ask, "Is your dinner okay?" And I like to say, "Oh, it sure is! You're a great cook." She'll get all flustered and usually answer, "Oh, I don't cook your dinner - I just serve it."

Friday, July 12, 2002

Your child's social life has officially begun when they get their first invitation to a friend's birthday party. Our kids have been to parties in the party room at fast food restaurants, at pizza places, homes with swimming pools. When our youngest son had his 16th birthday, we knew we'd have a hard time surprising him because he had watched us surprise his brother and his sister on their 16th. But I tricked him into going with me to check out a riding stable several days before his birthday - and that is where we surprised him. So his party was where the horses live. Lots of parties are often made special by the place where they're held.

Thursday, July 11, 2002

Wendy was my first real crush. I was 13, and she was beautiful. But I didn't know how to let her know my feelings toward her. So I saved up my allowances and went downtown and spent everything I had on this necklace. I put it in an envelope with a mushy note I wrote, and I nervously handed it to her in study hall. I was really swave, uh, suave at that age. Well, the next day in study hall she walked by my desk and handed me back a familiar looking envelope. Inside was the note and the necklace. I was crushed.

Wednesday, July 10, 2002

We had just reached the town where we were vacationing when our aging van took up smoking - like big black smoke billowing out from under the hood. We had it towed to a friend's garage for a diagnosis and prognosis. He announced that the patient needed a whole new engine - at a cost of about $2,000. We didn't even have $200.00. But somehow the word of that need leaked out to a church in the community, and people kept showing up at the garage with money toward that repair. Miraculously, God supplied the whole amount through His people. And the mechanic replaced the old engine with one that was considerably more powerful. Now, we had chugged up the hills on the way there ... we flew up the hills on the way home.

Tuesday, July 9, 2002

Courtney is the daughter of one of our staff, and she had a miserable cold on her ninth birthday. So, no party, no "happy birthdays" at school. I gave her a quick call that day and I sang "Happy Birthday" to her - which may have made her sicker. But I wanted to do something to cheer her up a little that day. You know, it's tough to be sick on your birthday. Well, Courtney and her seven-year-old brother Eddie were in the office the other day. I joked with them and said, "I guess Courtney's still eight - 'cause if you're sick on your birthday, it doesn't count." Ha ha, very funny. That night as Eddie was wrapping up his day, he told his Mother, "Hey, guess what? Courtney isn't two years older than me after all!" When Mom asked why, Eddie said, "Because Ron said that if you're sick on your birthday, your birthday doesn't count!" He was serious.

Monday, July 1, 2002

In the house where I grew up, we drank a lot of milk. In the house where my wife grew up, they tried to get her to drink a lot of milk. But there was one glass of milk she had when she was a little girl that sort of ruined milk for her from then on. It had this really bitter taste - and her parents, not knowing how it tasted, forced her to finish drinking it. Well, as Farm Girl explained it to City Boy here, their cows had apparently been eating something called bitterweed - which turns what they produce into something bitter. Just ask my wife.

Friday, June 28, 2002

As the kids were growing up, my wife and I would sometimes sneak into the kitchen to - well, the kids said it was to "smooch." We were known to occasionally grab a quick hug and kiss in what we thought was a private spot. One time when I started "smooching" with my wife, I forgot that our baby son was sitting there in his high chair. Suddenly, in the midst of this romantic moment, I hear this laughing, and clapping, and banging on his high chair tray. It was like he was saying, "Go for it, Mommy and Daddy!" And over the years, we would be hugging sometimes when we suddenly felt a little person wiggling in between us - sometimes two little persons, or even three. And invariably, we'd see big blue eyes looking up at us, and one of our kids saying, "Mommy, Daddy - can I be in the middle of your love?"

Thursday, June 27, 2002

It was 1908 - in the early days of Major League baseball in America. The Chicago Cubs and the New York Giants were battling it out for the National League championship and the opportunity to play in the World Series. New York first baseman Fred Merkle was in position to be a game-winning hero actually. He was on base when a teammate got a hit that would enable Merkle to score. And he thought he had as he crossed home plate. But the Cubs touched second base and claimed that Merkle had missed that base as he was running to score. The umpire ruled that the almost-hero was out at second because he hadn't touched the base. That mistake ultimately cost his team the championship.

Wednesday, June 26, 2002

There are few things more scary than the dormitory room of a college man. Let's just say that the average college guy does not put a high priority on order or cleanliness in his personal world. Some wife is listening and saying, "It's not just college guys, buddy!" Well, fine. I'm talking about college guys. One year in college, our son was in a suite where four guys shared two rooms and one bathroom. When I commented on the growing need for the bathroom floor to get washed, he told me about their neighbors' room. Those four men had somehow managed to go through the entire school year without once cleaning their bathroom floor. Of course, it got so gross that they didn't want to walk on it anymore. There were strange new organisms growing there. Oh, did they clean it then? Oh no, no - they put boards down on the floor to cover the mess!

Monday, June 24, 2002

I've got a friend who has a lot more beautiful jewelry than her income can afford. She's just really good at getting terrific deals in pawn shops. She only goes to the reputable ones and over the years, she's managed to keep trading up. My friend has an unbelievable instinct for a good deal and she's got the savvy to land that deal. The other day I saw her with this beautiful full-carat diamond ring on. The store price was $2,000 - which there was no way she had. But she had her little bag of trading treasures with her. She traded items that didn't really matter much to her - and she ended up getting that ring for $200.

Friday, June 21, 2002

I had an opportunity to spend a little time recently with a young man who just finished his hitch in the United States Marine Corps. He must have been a good one - he was trusted with some very sensitive, very strategic assignments. He reminded me of that tremendous two-word motto of the Marine Corps - "Semper fidelis." That's Latin, of course, for "always faithful." But then he told me that there is another unofficial motto that Marines have - one that helps them respond effectively to their assignments. "Semper Gumby." You're probably saying what I said when I heard it - "Uh, what did he say?" Well, you and I both heard it right. And, yes, he was referring to that animated clay figure, Gumby, that can bend any direction. So what is "Semper Gumby"? Always flexible!

Wednesday, June 19, 2002

Every generation has its favorite children’s TV programs - my source on the newest programs, of course, is my three-year-old grandson. The other day he told me about an animated character named Swiper who appears on this one show. Swiper is a fox who keeps - you guessed it - swiping things from the little girl who’s the star of the show. But, thankfully, the other characters are not defenseless against this little thief. Oh no, they have learned to shout three little words when the larcenous fox shows up - “Swiper, no swiping!” If they yell it three times, Swiper has to give back what he stole. Right!