Wednesday, September 29, 2004

My friend Bob is a pastor and a jogger. One day about a year ago, he went jogging and he came home and he started to do some work at his desk. He started to write his address, except his wife noticed it wasn't his address. That was his wife's first clue. It turned out that Bob had suffered a mild stroke while he was running. Now jogging really is good for you, but in this case, he had had a stroke and he didn't even realize it. He ended up losing a lot of speech and thought functions, and thankfully he pretty much recovered from that. But some of the sermon preparation he said, that used to take hours, can now take all week. It's amazing that in the middle of all this, Bob felt no pain when he was having a stroke. The doctor said, "You probably experienced a runner's high." It's a mysterious euphoria that takes over and it actually covers up the pain. It's kind of scary. You can run so hard that you can't feel the damage being done.

Tuesday, September 28, 2004

My flight was scheduled to leave Newark airport at 3:30, but there was bad weather at my destination, so they said we were postponed until 4:30. Then they said, "We have no idea when we'll be able to leave." Then they said, "We think we'll go at 5:30." We left at 6:00. Of course, that gave us lots of time to memorize the menu in the little restaurant, to check out the restroom several times, buy lots of magazines, and count the designs in the carpet. Well, they had to cancel another flight, so this was a very full plane. As passengers were lumbering aboard with all their luggage, the word came from the cockpit. The pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we are number two for take off. We've been assigned that position, but we only have twenty minutes to load this plane and take off, so would you please be seated as quickly as you can, wherever you can go." They knew we couldn't take off until everybody was seated, and it was chaotic. People were still trying to board the plane while the captain was pushing them verbally, the flight attendants pushing them physically. "Sit anywhere, we have to go. We're going to lose our spot and wait longer." The pilot came on again and said, "This is interesting folks. I know we said, 'Wait, wait, wait,' and then suddenly it's a rush." Well, we had waited for hours, and then suddenly, we had immediate clearance.

Monday, September 27, 2004

Several years ago, I had the privilege of visiting Old Jerusalem. And as I walked through the city, I saw this curious sight. I saw some Israeli soldiers who appeared to be on a holiday because they had their arm around their girls and they were laughing and shopping. The curious part was that they each had a gun strapped over their shoulder, an UZI, with a full clip of ammunition. Those Israeli soldiers know they always need to be prepared for war, even when they're taking a day off. So, they always carry their weapon.

Friday, September 3, 2004

Someday I might just be banned from restaurants. I mean, I've been known to give the help a hard time. That's not really what I'm trying to do. I figure sometimes it just gets so humdrum and boring, waiting on people, and too often customers treat you like you're part of the menu, or a vending machine. So, it's fun to inject some laughs into their day. For example, I've been known to walk into a restaurant, and the lady will ask, "Table for two?" I'll say, "Well, yes, but we have a busload of thirty-eight junior high students waiting. Should we bring them in now?" You should see the priceless look on her face. I immediately let her know I'm kidding, though. I always ask for the server's name by telling him or her that, "My mother told me to never talk to strangers." And when I'm ordering one of my favorite hamburger and cheese sandwiches, I have been known to ask, "Is Patty in?" "Patty who?" the waitress asks innocently. "Patty Melt," I tell her, as her eyes disappear to the top of her head.

I'm just trying to lighten up their lives. We also try to encourage them and compliment them. Sometimes I'll tell the server, "Hey, you're a great cook." They look a little unsure about how to react to that. They'll say, "Oh, I didn't cook it. I just serve it." I knew that.

Wednesday, September 1, 2004

I was talking with a young man who's a student in a missionary aviation course the other day. So far, he's mostly had classroom training, although he did have a little experience when he visited the Flight Training facility. On the second day they said, "Okay, go for it!" And he was flying! Now he was carrying his notepad with him on the day I saw him, and I noticed this sentence that he had written at the top of his notes. It was obviously something he thought he would be tested on, either in the classroom or maybe in the cockpit someday. It could be life or death information some day. Here's what it said. "Attitude - The relationship of the nose to the horizon." Now he told me, that simple discipline is what keeps an aircraft stable - and maybe you, too.

Tuesday, August 31, 2004

Our Native American ministry team has been to reservations all over the country, and we have some special memories from all of them. I'm thinking of one from Arizona and New Mexico, a time we were there. We're always very busy while we're there, but we did have one day off, so we all packed into a van to go see this spectacular canyon. It was approaching dark as we were returning, and we thought, "Let's see, there are two ways back, and we have to get up early tomorrow morning for a meeting." One way was long but it was paved, the other was short but it was unpaved across the mountain. We decided we'd take the short road, even though it was a little bumpy. I started driving, then my wife took over and all of a sudden we felt the van lurching. And she said, "Oh, no! I think we're out of gas. I can't believe it!" Well, someone had mentioned briefly that there was a problem with the fuel gauge before we left, so I glanced at it before we left town, and it said three quarters of a tank. It would have been a good idea to fill up before we left civilization, and as a result, here we sat in the dark because I didn't, on a lonely back road, forty miles from the nearest town and praying like crazy. Thank God, He sent us a Good Samaritan who went forty miles for gas. So Ron, did you learn anything?

Friday, August 27, 2004

Our friends were kind enough to loan my wife and me their second home where we could get away for a couple of days. When you're in somebody else's home, you have to be on your good behavior, like make sure you don't break anything, leave it as you found it. I was having a little difficulty getting the front door unjammed, uh, unlocked I guess, and my wife said, "What are you doing?" And I jokingly said, "Well, I couldn't get it unlocked, so I'm just forcing it open." She said, "No, no, no, no, don't do that." Now there's a reason we had that little dialogue. She panicked right away because, well, she knows my history.

If I was trying to force it open, I would probably break it. Oh, I did get out okay, but she knows I have this tendency to try to make things work if they don't want to work. I sometimes get impatient with things that don't work quickly. In fact, I've been known to force a door handle and break it. There have been a couple of occasions where I have forced a tool, and I broke it. You will probably never lend me anything. I've tried to force a lock, and I broke it. I've tried to force other things, and they broke too.

Thursday, August 26, 2004

If you live on the East Coast, there's one word that's probably sure to get your attention - hurricane! Now I'll tell you, Hurricane Hugo was one of those mega storms that really got our attention. You could watch the news for several nights before Hugo arrived, and they'd show you this cyclonic circle inching across that weather map toward an uncertain destination. Half a million people were evacuated from Florida to the Carolinas, not knowing where that destructive little circle on the map was going to land. Finally, it became clear that Hugo's 130-mile-an-hour winds were going to slam ashore at Charleston, South Carolina. The challenge for public officials was to convince everyone that it was time to move. The mayor at the time gave a very solemn warning to the people there. He was quoted as saying, "Hugo is a killer. If you stay, you may very well die." Well, that was true then. It's true now.

Wednesday, August 25, 2004

Many of the world's greatest dramas are not on a stage, not on a screen. They are played out in that quadrennial spectacle we call "The Olympics." Maybe you remember the year that there was this image that many of us will never forget. Britain's representative in the 400-meter race was Derek Redmond, and he began to falter. He went down in the backstretch with a torn right hamstring, and as the medical attendants were approaching, Derek Redmond fought his way to his feet and then he started out again in anguish - he was hopping. He was desperately trying to finish the race. He knew he wouldn't win. He was just trying to finish.

Tuesday, August 24, 2004

I've watched three kids run on this track called high school senior. Oh, and we know about the disease. It's a creepy disease called "Senioritis." I've seen it for years in other teenagers and then finally, we watched it in our own home. It begins with the sense of "Okay, I'm a Senior now, high school is my past. I do not care about high school anymore, even though I have another year." At best, a senior just slacks off until graduation, or at worst, he or she becomes irresponsible and maybe even destructive. Senioritis does not bring out the best in anybody, at any age.

Friday, August 20, 2004

I am really easily amazed by technology, so I am totally amazed by my wife's camera. She is quite a photographer, by the way. You can take the same camera and get two totally different views just by using two different lenses. For example, we've taken many pictures at football games, and when you put on the wide-angle lens, you can see the entire field through that camera. When you change over to what's called a macro lens, that really magnifies things, you can fill that camera's view with one face in the stands. It amazes me to see how we can go from the big picture to the smallest detail.

Thursday, August 19, 2004

Now here's an example of a bad day. You're driving 83 miles an hour. Suddenly you become aware of someone coming up behind you who would like to meet you. He's got a uniform; he's got a blinking light. Oh, and you left your driver's license at home. Now this is a very bad day, and you are about to have the book thrown at you. This really happened to my friend Allison. She was driving and her friend Leslie was with her. Now Leslie had her license with her. Don't ask me how they did this, but before that officer reached the car, Leslie traded places with Allison, the driver - the licenseless one. The integrity here leaves something to be desired, I know that, but the love is pretty strong. Yep, Leslie took the violation and the penalty for her friend.

Wednesday, August 18, 2004

The idea of teamwork in marriage isn't really that tough. For example, my wife prepares a meal and I clear the table and rinse the dishes. Now, I'm known as the mad cleaning man around our house. I might clean your plate while you're still in mid-bite, you know? I like to get my job done. Now, I've had some people say to me over the years, "Oh, leave the dishes. Don't worry about them now. Come on into the living room with us. The dishes will wait." I have never known the dishes to rinse themselves or put themselves away. In fact, it is a wise discipline to rinse a dirty dish immediately.

Tuesday, August 17, 2004

Becky was my first serious crush. "Serious" meant I thought she was beautiful. At least, that's what my 13-year-old eyes told me, and that's why I was so surprised when she said she'd been in a violent automobile accident not long before that. I just moved into town, and I didn't know anything about the accident. She said it had done very serious damage to her face and there were all kinds of scars. Well, I didn't see any trace of it. I know that 13-year-old love is blind, but obviously, something had happened to those scars. Actually, a plastic surgeon had taken care of those scars, and he must have been good. He had very skillfully taken scars and recreated something beautiful.

Friday, August 13, 2004

I was on an airplane flight from Chicago to Newark, and I was busy working, until suddenly, the pilot put on the brakes. We weren't really near Newark yet, so I tried to figure out what was going on. It looked as if the plane was beginning to circle, and our wing was dipped down a little bit. Pretty soon, I said, "You know what? I believe I've seen that house before. I think I've seen that field before. I've seen those trees before." I got to see them again, and again, and another time. We were in that time warp that is dreaded by every frequent flier: the holding pattern. We weren't standing still (which was a good thing), we were using up time, we were using up fuel, we were in constant motion. We weren't going anywhere. We weren't making any progress.

Thursday, August 12, 2004

Single parenting is no longer the exception in America. There are millions of families where it's just a mom or just a dad. You know, there's been a lot of conversation and a lot of articles written, a lot of commentary about the impact of not having a dad that is really being a father to you. In fact, one of the leading health officers in the United States said this: "The greatest issue facing us is fatherlessness." Time Magazine commented on women who choose to have a fatherless family. Here's what they said: "They are bringing a child into the world with a hole at the center of his life where a father should be."

Wednesday, August 11, 2004

A beard really changes people - especially men. You can make a man look older, scruffier, wiser, or more suspicious. A beard does amazing things. Some wives and girlfriends can't wait for the man to grow it. Others can't wait for him to shave it. My friend, Lou, spent much of his life clean-shaven. He also spent many of those same years as an alcoholic. They were terrible years for his wife and daughters. One day, Lou became so desperate that he surrendered the control of his out-of-control life to Jesus Christ. From that moment on, the Savior beat that bottle that had always beaten Lou, and right about then, he started to grow a beard. He's actually had it for several years, but a couple of years ago he decided to shave it one morning. He walked out to his family, and he said, "Hey, what do you think?" His little daughter began to cry. She begged her Daddy to grow his beard back. See, the old face made her think of her old Dad. She was afraid the old Dad was back.

Monday, August 9, 2004

Ever since I was little, I've been fascinated by the American Revolution. I always wanted to see Concord Bridge where it sort of all began. You know, the shot heard round the world? By the time I got there, I had two little boys of my own who weren't fascinated by the American Revolution. I wanted to spend a while at Concord Bridge, you know, imagining those Colonial farmers descending on the bridge and the Red Coats stepping up to the bridge in their rigid formation. Unfortunately, my sons weren't interested in any of that. I tried to tell them the story - well, no progress, you know, this is vacation. Who cares about history? Right? Finally, I had one last idea. I got tri-corn hats for them, and we got some sticks for them to use as muskets, and I made them the Americans and I played the Red Coats. (Well, the Red Coat.) They came charging across one side of Concord Bridge. I went running away from them; I eventually ended up fatally wounded! And when they were done, they said, "Let's do it again, Daddy." Of course - they won! They were interested, but not until they had a part.

Friday, August 6, 2004

"I want to give you a boat." That's what Carl announced to me. Actually it was to the ministry that I was involved with at that time. And I was grateful, but I wasn't quite sure what to do with a boat! Now Carl had this little fishing boat, and it was run down and he couldn't use it because he had had a heart attack, and now he gave it to us to sell. We were really in a tight time financially, so I accepted the boat gratefully. I asked a boating friend of mine how much it was worth, and he said, "Oh, I think about $1,000," and that's exactly what Carl said he could have sold it for. Well, we needed the money, so I recruited this work crew of 20 people and we went down to the Jersey Shore and we scraped off the barnacles off the bottom. We got new bottom paint on it. We scrubbed, we disinfected, we put up new curtains. We serviced the engine, we did a total makeover on that boat. Let me tell you what God did. We sold it for $4,200. Man, did the value of that vessel change when it changed hands.

Thursday, August 5, 2004

Caterpillars are, well, ugly. Butterflies are beautiful! I have known people with butterfly collections. I've never known anyone with a caterpillar collection, actually. My guess is that every caterpillar gets pretty fed up inching along instead of flying. They get fed up with being hairy and ugly instead of being colorful and eye-catching. But, fed up won't do it. The caterpillar actually has to get into this cocoon and get metamorphed. Now, it's a word that we have for that miraculous process. It means changing your form - metamorphosis - right? There's something for you in that cocoon, by the way, especially if you're tired of crawling spiritually or if your spiritual experience gets pretty hairy sometimes.