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If you're a teenager, it's got to be one of the ugliest sentences in the English language. You ready? "You're grounded!" Or if you're a traveler who flies very much, it's not a very nice word for you either. "All flights have been grounded." And if you're a Christian, it's not a fun word either. But there's a way to be grounded without being ground under.
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So this friend of mine pulled out his wallet and said, "Ron, can I show you my pride and joy?" And he did. There was a picture of a little dusting compound called Pride and a dish washing detergent called Joy. So, here were these two household items. I was fully expecting to see his children, but then, of course, I have strange friends.
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Our second child was in college; we had just one left at home. And honestly, I hadn't totally figured out the adjusted grocery needs at our house. I always made sure we had plenty of quick breakfast food around. We needed that because of our crazy lifestyle. And because I hadn't figured out the new math for our new family configuration, I bought way too many donuts or muffins or bagels or whatever a few times. When that happened they sat around a lot longer and they turned a little dry, a little tough, and then they got a little hard. But that's where the microwave comes to the rescue. You pop them in, you warm them up briefly, and what was hard turns soft.
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There's not much amusing, of course, about an automobile accident, but my friend Jean's accident did have a little smile at the end; at least in retrospect. This car came charging into her right rear door all of a sudden, and "boom" there was one of those discouraging days when your car doesn't quite look the same as when you left home.
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My wife and I will take turns at the wheel on a long trip, and we have two different approaches to observing the speed limit. In her case, she likes to set it on cruise control, and that's a great invention. You can set your speed, and stay at that speed indefinitely. Not so much me. You see, I'd rather be able to really accelerate for a hill and keep up with the traffic sometimes as they say; to vary my speed. I know I can just break and reset the cruise control, but I'd rather not bother with it. In a sense, not so much about driving, but I just want to discourage you from setting your own cruise control.
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My wife is one of the most generous people I know. We've never had a whole lot to spend on gifts, but somehow she usually finds a way to give them. Over the years God has blessed us with some friends who have been very generous with us. They have invited us to get away to their cabin or their cottage or their farm. I can remember occasions where I've been all packed and ready to go and anxious to leave, and my wife hasn't come out yet. I'll go back inside and I'll say, "Honey, what are you doing?" You know where she is? She's rummaging through her gift box or her gift closet, and she'll say, "Wait a minute, Honey, I'm looking for a gift."
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I was once held hostage by a dragonfly. This is very embarrassing, but it is true. I was just a little guy and my cousin and I were sitting on these swings in her backyard. I believed everything she said. And a dragonfly started to circle us on the swings. He was a big old guy; at least he looked big compared to the size I was then. And then he landed on the swing, and my cousin said to me, "You know, if they get mad at you they'll drill a hole through you."
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It's a nice deal when your auto mechanic is also your good friend. And I've had that opportunity – Christian brothers. What I've really appreciated about my friend, the auto mechanic, was the fact that he worked long, and hard, and professionally.
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I guess I'd call it one of the ugly words of our time – the word hostage. We've all seen our share of hostage situations haven't we? Some are right here in the United States. When someone has taken a hostage or several hostages, the first thing they do is they bring in the hostage negotiating team and they do their very best to use their psychology and human relations to talk that person into releasing their hostages.
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Did you ever notice this little law of life? Just about the time you get comfortable in a place, the scenery changes. You're all comfy at home as a little child, and you think this is a world you can handle. You just figured out your house and the yard, and suddenly somebody plunges you into this unfamiliar jungle of kindergarten with all these crazy kids in this classroom. And then you get pretty comfortable in elementary school. You say, "Hey, I know how to handle this place. I've conquered this place." And no sooner do you get on top of that, and they plunge you into the junior high zoo.
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The first time my dad shamed me into riding a roller coaster, honestly, I couldn't wait to get off. Roller coasters aren't always fun.
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When you play high school football, you learn to play another game too. It's called Impress the Coaches. Of course, the coaches decide who plays, who starts, who sits. All summer long players show up for weight lifting in this steamy, hot weight room. Now, they come three times a week. Why would guys want to come and sweat and strain? Because the coaches are there. You can't help but ask how many of those fellows would show up if, well let's say the coaches suddenly announced they were taking a week off, "Fellows, you keep coming. We just won't be here all next week, okay?" I have a feeling the attendance would really go down in the weight room.
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It's a bitter wound! I was undefeated in Scrabble until my son beat me at the age of 13. It was down to the end of the game, there were no letters left to draw and I was about to be stuck with a Z. Now, if you've ever played Scrabble, you know that a Z is worth 10 points if you can play it. You lose 10 points if you're stuck with it at the end of the game. Okay, this is heavy pressure. Finally I found one corner of the board that had the letters I and T and there was room for a Z. I suddenly remembered that slightly uncouth slang term the teenagers use for blemishes. I used my Z to spell zit. I've often heard kids complain about zits.
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Sometimes speaking outside my home area, I could end up in a different motel each night. And sometimes, my wife went with me and we drove. That was nice. We had to take a few pieces of luggage with us because we had to dress for a change in temperatures (Often we were going to two or three climates it seems like.), and we had different kinds of meetings to go to. So we were a little over-"luggaged". But my wife prepared us very well for the madness of being in and out of motels. She packed everything we would need for overnight and the next morning in one little carry-in bag. That's pretty smart! We didn't need to carry everything in. We weren't planning to stay.
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It was quite a few years ago when I heard about this young man on Long Island who took his sister for a ride in the family car. You say, "Oh, big deal." Well, it's no big deal except that the boy was five years old. Yes, it's true! His mother was sick in bed and his little sister said, "I want to go to New York City." So he crawled up on top of the refrigerator, got his mother's car keys out of her purse, took his sister out, belted her in, put on his seat belt, turned on the car, managed to get it in reverse, and backed it out of their narrow driveway onto their street. He drove up to a stop sign, then he turned left onto a major thoroughfare, and made it successfully to two traffic lights and stopped. Then he moved forward when he was supposed to.
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My wife and I took a trip to the mountains and, in a way, to her childhood. We visited an old Smokey Mountain community that the Park Service preserved over the years. It's called Cades Cove. It used to be inhabited by a lot of mountain folk. Now, my wife grew up in a Yankee family who lived in the Ozarks on a farm. So she experienced both.
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I wonder what the question most asked by Christian teenagers is? I don't have any formal research to report to you today, but I have been listening to teenagers for a lot of years, and a lot has changed over those years. But I'm not sure the big question they have has. It was and continues to be, I think the most asked. It's not, "How do I have better devotions?" Or, "How can I serve the Lord?" It's, "How far can I go?" Wish I'd have a dollar for every time I've been asked that question. And they're not talking about driving privileges when they ask that question. How far can I go? Actually, long after our dating years are over, you know, that still seems to be the question we're dealing with. That's too bad.
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I remember the day we ran into some newlywed friends of ours. They just had that look, you know, hand-in-hand and grinning. The bride and my daughter started to talk excitedly about how the wedding went. When it was time to leave, I couldn't find my daughter, until I got into the van.
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I used to be at Moody Bible Institute several times a year to do some radio programs, and I was usually there on a weekend. Now, Moody is right in the heart of Chicago. If you are in the heart of any big city, you've got to think security, especially on the weekend when a lot of things are closed and there's no one working. You don't want people just wandering around your buildings then.
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I don't think Alexander Graham Bell could ever have conceived how much we would use his little invention called the telephone, or how many ways we would think up to use it! You know, some of those magic three-number prefixes that we all know so well; the 800 number, because 800 equals toll free calls, and there's 888, and there are all kinds of them now. We're pretty quick to make that call. Then there are the 900 numbers; the toll rich calls. You really want to be very slow to make those calls. Those 900 numbers can access everything from Santa Claus at Christmastime to party lines for lonely people, to pornography.
