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So this friend of mine pulled out his wallet and said, "Ron, can I show you my pride and joy?" And he did. There was a picture of a little dusting compound called Pride and a dishwashing detergent called Joy. So, here were these two household items. I was fully expecting to see his children, but then, of course, I have strange friends.
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I have to confess, I didn't exactly go storming into the Computer Age. I was sort of carried into it. Yeah, you know, back in the days when I was getting into that world, I was returning from my first trip to an Indian reservation, and I had a heart full that I wanted to write into a report. So, as usual in those days, I pulled out my trusty pen and paper and handwrote my report. It took the whole trip from Arizona to New Jersey. Well, after one of my friends read my report, he called my wife and said, "I don't want Ron wasting any more time writing things like this by hand. He has to get a computer." My wife agreed, but she indicated we didn't have the funds to get a computer. My doctor friend said, "That doesn't matter. I intend to buy a computer for him!" I was stunned, and shortly thereafter, the owner of a wonderful personal computer. Ever since then, what a difference, huh? I mean that's greatly impacted my life!
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When you live around New York City like I did for 30 years, you take people on lots of tours. We've had friends visit us from all over the country - all over the world - and, of course, they all want to see the sights of New York that they've heard so much about. Well, we got to take many of them to the Statue of Liberty, the late great World Trade Center, Times Square, Broadway, the United Nations, Central Park. And something interesting actually happened to me as I introduced others to the place that I knew so much about and that I'd seen a lot of times. In a sense, I sort of discovered those places for myself in a new way, and I was actually energized by watching their reactions to seeing it all for the first time.
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Our family has gone into New York City at times when we lived in that area with some blankets and food and gifts for homeless people, but we had to find them in order to meet them. Sometimes, they were in a park; other times they were under or near a viaduct or overpass. One night we found a little village of homeless people on a vacant lot next to the bus depot with their makeshift shelters against the back wall of the depot. I remember the time that I interviewed a homeless man on the street. I wanted to get his story out to people through my radio program. He actually let me crawl right into that large cardboard box that he called home. I guess when you're homeless you seek shelter and warmth wherever you can find it.
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Our second child was in college; we had just one left at home. And honestly, I hadn't totally figured out the adjusted grocery needs at our house. I always made sure we had plenty of quick breakfast food around. We needed that because of our crazy lifestyle. And because I hadn't figured out the new math for our new family configuration, I bought way too many donuts or muffins or bagels or whatever a few times. When that happened they sat around a lot longer and they turned a little dry, a little tough, and then they got a little hard. But that's where the microwave comes to the rescue. You pop them in, you warm them up briefly, and what was hard turns soft.
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It was supposed to be a one-hour fishing trip off the coast of South Carolina. For 17-year-old Josh and his 15-year-old friend Troy, it turned out to be a six-day nightmare at sea. When they set out on their little 14-foot Sunfish, they didn't know about the small craft warnings in the area. Within hours, the fierce winds had pulled them out to sea - to a point 111 miles north - well outside of the Coast Guard's search area. They fought to stay alive, eating raw jellyfish and gargling sea water. They were severely sunburned, exhausted and dehydrated.
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My wife was one of the most generous people I've ever known. We never had a whole lot to spend on gifts, but somehow she usually found a way to give them. Over the years God has blessed us with some friends who have been very generous with us. They have invited us to get away to their cabin or their cottage or their farm. I can remember occasions where I've been all packed and ready to go and anxious to leave, and my wife hadn't come out yet. I'd go back inside and I'd say, "Honey, what are you doing?" You know where she is? She's rummaging through her gift box or her gift closet, and she would say, "Wait a minute, Honey, I'm looking for a gift."
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Look, whether you're a Yankee or a Confederate at heart, you don't take much joy in what happened at what is called the "High Water Mark of the Confederacy." If you're a Civil War buff, you know that's where the Union Army turned back Pickett's Charge at the Battle of Gettysburg. Some 15,000 Confederate soldiers marched courageously across a field in a very tightly-packed formation, advancing on 40,000 Union soldiers. Only 150 of those Southern soldiers made it. General Lee had made an honest but tragic mistake. See, he'd been trained at West Point in Napoleon's war tactics - masses of men, advancing against imprecise, short-range weapons until they could overwhelm the opposing troops in hand-to-hand combat. Unfortunately, things had changed since that kind of strategy had won battles for Napoleon. Recent technology of that time had greatly improved the range and the accuracy of the rifles that the Union Army was using, which meant those masses of men were brought down long before they could ever reach enemy lines.
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It's a nice deal when your auto mechanic is also your good friend. And I've had that opportunity. What I've really appreciated about my friend, the auto mechanic, was the fact that he worked long, hard, and professionally.
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Our friends John and Marie have a lovely family area in their home that they call the Great Room. And it really is a great room - big fireplace, lots of comfortable couch and chairs, tastefully decorated. It's just one of those rooms that people are drawn into like a magnet, and you don't want to leave. And on the wall near the fireplace, a beautiful painting. That's new. See, it hasn't always been there...until the wall cracked. Now, they tell me it was some kind of water damage, but it has left a really ugly hole in the wall. But who would know? It's covered up with this lovely painting!
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Did you ever notice this little law of life? Just about the time you get comfortable in a place, the scenery changes. You're all comfy at home as a little child, and you think this is a world you can handle. You just figured out your house and the yard, and suddenly somebody plunges you into this unfamiliar jungle of kindergarten with all these crazy kids in this classroom. And then you get pretty comfortable in elementary school. You say, "Hey, I've got this figured out. I know how to handle this place." And no sooner do you get on top of that, and they plunge you into the middle school or junior high.
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There are some things that are just tough to advertise - like things people need but don't want to think about. Like insurance to pay your funeral expenses some day. Well, a local insurance agency gave it a good try in the newspaper ad they ran. In bold letters it said, "FINAL PAYMENT." It went on to make a case for doing something now to take care of the last obligation of your life. Of course, that ad had a serious inaccuracy.
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Because we lived along the East Coast for so many years, we had the opportunity to see many of America's old lighthouses. I mean, we came up over the top of a hill on an interstate one day and I saw what I certainly never expected to see hundreds of miles from the ocean. It was a lighthouse with a bright, functioning light on top. Obviously, it wasn't there to point any ships in the right direction. Actually, it was part of a church that stands right near the highway. This lighthouse is for people!
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Years ago, I was at a youth conference where we needed to raise some money for a camp scholarship fund. So we challenged the kids to buy their counselor into this Friday night food fight. Well, the kids found the money alright pretty quickly! So, Friday night all of us leaders showed up on the field of battle with the campers watching like sadistic spectators at the Roman Coliseum. Now, for starters, we got hosed down so everything would cling to us. I have to tell you, in retrospect, I'm embarrassed about the food we wasted.
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When you play high school football, you learn to play another game too. It's called Impress the Coaches. Of course, the coaches decide who plays, who starts, who sits. All summer long players show up for weight lifting in this steamy, hot weight room. Now, they come three times a week. Why would guys want to come and sweat and strain? Because the coaches are there. You can't help but ask how many of those fellows would show up if, well let's say the coaches suddenly announced they were taking a week off, "Fellows, you keep coming. We just won't be here all next week, okay?" I have a feeling the attendance would really go down in the weight room.
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It happened over 100 years ago, but we still seem to be fascinated with it - the Titanic. I mean, the Titanic has sailed into the Internet! You can find all kinds of information about the sinking of that "unsinkable" ship back in 1912. And then, there was the Academy Award-winning movie, endless TV shows, articles, and there was even a Broadway musical about it. It seems like fascination with the Titanic just never goes away.
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I was once held hostage by a dragonfly. This is very embarrassing, but it is true. I was just a little guy and my cousin and I were sitting on these swings in her backyard. I believed everything she said. And a dragonfly started to circle us on the swings. He was a big old guy - at least he looked big compared to the size I was then. And then he landed on the swing, and my cousin said to me, "You know, if they get mad at you they'll drill a hole through you."
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Ah yes, World History class. I'm sure you remember everything you heard there very vividly, right? No. If you remember anything, you probably remember that for centuries the nations of Europe were fighting it out to be number one on their block - often using their ships to build their empires. Now, if you were out on the high seas back then, sailing, let's say for England, the only way you knew if an approaching ship was friend or foe was by their colors flying from the mast. That was also how they would know whether or not to shoot at you as well. As the story goes, many captains decided to strategically lower their colors in a risky situation so folks wouldn't know what their allegiance was. But apparently there were a few bold and courageous skippers who gave a different kind of order to their crew. It went like this: "Nail the colors to the mast." "Uh, sir, that means we can't lower our colors if we need to?" "That's right, matey. Nail them to the mast!"
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I think I've lost the same five pounds 200 times - uh-huh. That's enough to make about six of me! Actually, I used to weigh 55 pounds more a number of years ago, and I lost it. But that's no great accomplishment. As anybody will tell you who has that same battle, the challenge is to keep it off. So I set a certain ceiling, and then I would kind of have this anchor weight. And as my weight creeps up there, which it often does, I yell down to the engine room, "Reverse all engines! It's time to go to work!" Frankly, it's just too hard to fight 20 or 25 pounds. It's much smarter, I've learned, to fight the problem when it's a baby than when it's full grown.
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It's hard to describe to you how our first grandchild lit up our lives. He had a smile that was really a people-stopper. Yeah, I know I sound like a grandfather. Now, it's a good thing this is radio or you'd have to look at my pictures as well! One day when he was about eight months old, I came home from the office to a pleasant surprise. My wife and I were babysitting our grandson. There he was, sitting on his Grandma's lap, leaning against her. I knelt down in front of the chair and told him what I tell him often. "I love you." He just looked at me, without changing his expression. I repeated it again - no response. Then two more times. "I love you." Suddenly he smiled, his arms started reaching, and his whole body leaned forward for me to hold him. And I did.
