Friday, July 13, 2012
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All right, crossword puzzle fans, here we go! What is a three letter word for an annoying woman? Wait, wait, wait, wait! Don't put somebody's name in there like Sue. Don't do that. Let's see...the three letter word is uh...nag, right? N-A-G. And if you know a nag, you know there can be many cross words that come from her. I can't think of any names less desirable for a woman to be called. Who wants to be a nag? Who wants to be around one? But nags don't just happen. Oh no. They're made, not born.
I'm Ron Hutchcraft and I want to have A Word With You about "Nothing Worse Than a Nag."
Now, our word for today from the Word of God is found in Proverbs 21. I'm going to read verse 9, and then I'm going to skim over to verse 19 since it's on the same subject. Here's what it says, "Better to live on a corner of the roof than to share a house with a quarrelsome wife." Who says God doesn't have a sense of humor? Picture the guy up living on the roof. You know, "I'm going on the roof, Honey." Look, you notice this says, "If you are living with a nag, it would be better for you to go up and live there."
But that's not enough. Listen to what Solomon says now in verse 19:, "Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and ill tempered wife." He says the roof isn't good enough; you can still hear her on the roof. I'm going to the desert; at least I can't hear her there. Well, the Bible talks about nags here doesn't it; a quarrelsome, contentious wife? But hang on guys. Oh, no, you're not going to go free on this one totally.
Now, I have a word for today for potential nags, just in case you might turn out to be one some day, and for those who live with a candidate for naghood. Now, if you're tempted to be one, let me remind you of this: When you push on somebody...just do it physically. Put your hand on them and push on them. They're going to go the opposite way. That's a little physical experiment you can try. Now, the more you push, the farther and faster the person's going to go the other way. And the very thing you're trying to make happen you will delay and maybe you'll make it never happen.
I like what Ruth Graham, Billy Graham's wife, said. She said, "It is my job to love Billy. It's God's job to change him." It's wonderful when a woman can provide a climate of safety and security, and confidence and unconditional love in which a man might actually take the risk of changing.
But let's talk about the other side of this coin; the person who lives around the nag. Remember, nags are made, not born. When someone, and especially a woman, from what the Bible says here, feels she isn't being heard by someone she loves, she will talk louder, and longer, and more often to get heard. She's trying to find a way to get into the life of the man who promised his life to her. So, a man says, "Hey, I thought I married a thoroughbred. How'd I get a nag?" Look in the mirror. Look in the mirror. Because if a woman feels unheard by the man who's promised his life to her, she will talk louder and longer and more often.
Maybe you have a wife, a mother, a sister, or a daughter who just keeps pushing. Well, think about your part in helping her become like that. Maybe you've been the nag maker.
See, you can help change her. Start to hear her out; don't make her talk louder and longer. Offer your attention to her. She's been assuming she won't be heard. Why don't you show her that you will hear her out, not just her first sentence, but the whole paragraph? Sometimes she doesn't want you to fix anything; she just wants you to hear her heart. And then, if you're going to talk about solutions, do something about them. And love her enough to let her know that she is heard by you.
You and I and Solomon all agree. In fact, just about everybody agrees. There's nothing worse than a nag. So, let's decide right now not to be a nag. Oh yeah, or to create one.